lestercraft: (I should say something)
Arthur Lester ([personal profile] lestercraft) wrote2022-10-31 05:48 pm
Entry tags:

TLV: IC Inbox



"This is Arthur Lester. I'm not available right now, but do leave a message and I'll find the time. A-a voice message, please."

Text | Audio | Video | Spam


[OOC: Please note Arthur is blind, so audio format is strongly ICly preferred, but by God don't let that stop you]
greatoldjohn: (in: looking over)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 01:50 am (UTC)(link)
There's a long silence then.

"Then nothing's changed. I'm still the scorpion on your back."

That shouldn't hurt as much as it does. But part of the reason it does is knowing how he'd fucked up, the terrible mistake he'd made. The ways Arthur was right.

At the same time, there was all of the work he'd done here, all of the ways he'd tried to make their friendship real and not... necessity. Not 'work'. Not Arthur struggling to put up with a thing that he's 'accepted' will hurt him.

Not Arthur probably thinking it's what he deserves.

He tries to push all of the emotion out of his voice as he moves on. He doesn't think they're going to change each other's mind here. And focusing on it-

After all of that, he doesn't have it in him to go at Arthur.

"How far ahead did you go?"
greatoldjohn: (in: looking over)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 02:32 am (UTC)(link)
"I went farther," he reports. "We were driving to New York in one of Larson's cars."

That's all he says. He'd wanted to say more. He'd wanted to tell him about how it all happened. How he'd made the deal with Kayne. How Arthur had almost bled out. How John had stitched him together.

How they'd saved those people. How he'd trusted Arthur against all logic.

How he knows in that moment in the car, Arthur had trusted him.

But unlike all the suffering, all the mistakes, that doesn't feel real right now. A lot of things don't feel real right now. So he'll stick to the facts.
Edited 2022-12-22 02:55 (UTC)
greatoldjohn: (in: visions and trauma)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 05:10 am (UTC)(link)
John disagrees. Mostly because now he knows more about what's to come. He knows about Kayne, an entity who has interest in Arthur. He knows about his deal, and about Arthur's. He knows about Yellow.

And because even with all the hardship, all the pain, all the terror, all of everything, at least he was there for Arthur.

"Should I-" he pauses and he doesn't know what he wants to say. He doesn't even know what he can offer. All of the things he's learned and tried here feel insufficient. Childish. "...do you want me to go?"
greatoldjohn: ("...you remember.")

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 06:01 am (UTC)(link)
There's no hesitation for him either. Because he hadn't needed to see all that to know he'll choose Arthur every time. He's known that for...

Well, rather longer.

He brushes the mask by his fingers before sliding up to settle snug against his left arm as the life returns to it.

That's when he feels like he can say-

[You do save those people in the cave. All of them.

You choose that.
]
greatoldjohn: (out: cuddles)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 06:35 am (UTC)(link)
[...you were much better after you had an apple.]

Look, it sounds stupid but he'd seen the difference it made. Packed lunches might very well be in Arthur's less horrifying but more immediate future.
greatoldjohn: (out: reading with Arthur)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 06:54 am (UTC)(link)
[We'll look out for that. ]

Quiet determination and soft amusement; the usual delight at Arthur's laughter when it isn't at his expense.

[There is one other thing I want to settle. If you think you're up for it.

...it's not a bad thing. At least, I hope not.
]
greatoldjohn: (out: deep inhale)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 07:35 am (UTC)(link)
There's the grumpy growly noise he makes sometimes but it too has no teeth to it.

Then he takes a moment to settle himself so he can get to it.

[I-

I love you.

And I hate that I didn't work up the courage to say that before everything happened. Here or there.
]

A pause before-

[I'm not expecting anything back.
That's not the point. I just... wanted you to know.
]
greatoldjohn: (together: all that I am)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-22 01:55 pm (UTC)(link)
He supposes this is his own fault, really, for adding this to a fraught discussion during a tender period. He had his reasons: that terrifying brush with their future had frustrated him, that the words were unspoken, that he might have to leave Arthur before he spoke them. And the wild trilling bell of sensation he feels in the core of his being at those feelings being returned is a direct counter to the emotional freight train blow from earlier, not that he thinks that's changed and he takes it as a personal challenge.

But now he has the problem that Arthur put himself out like that to him, spoke words that might as well be gold in every sense, words he will treasure as much as any poem... and proceeded to follow it up with the stupidest fucking thing he's ever heard.

'What worth'? The very core of his understanding of the thing, the source of his very means to love, to know what it is, it's value on a personal level, the very stuff that entangles them-

[You let me worry about that. Suffice it to say, it holds great worth to me.]
Edited 2022-12-22 13:57 (UTC)
greatoldjohn: (in: arm and lighter)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-24 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
[Arthur...]

His heart is in the words, all of them, no matter how intense. Perhaps especially in such a case.

[There is no one on this boat who knows how much of a vicious fuck I can be. Which is why I promise you, Arthur:

I will do everything I can to stay alive, to not go back to the dark world. But if there's no way out? If there's no hope at all?

I will make sure to take you with me.
]

And he knows, knows, Arthur will understand the love in that promise. Because he, John, would hate that. But for Arthur, he will.
Edited (Cadence) 2022-12-25 17:28 (UTC)
greatoldjohn: (in: looking over)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-26 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
The hand squeezes back.

[We'll do everything in our power to make sure it doesn't.]

He can't promise that they won't get there, not after all that. But he's given the promise that matters. He won't die on Arthur. He'll do whatever he needs to to survive and get back to him.

Speaking of...

[...do you think Kayne can see what happens here?]
greatoldjohn: (out: the roots)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-26 04:20 am (UTC)(link)
[I would agree. I don't think he can see into this place.]

A pause.

[But I'd like to check with the Admiral. Do you think that's a good idea?]

John curls a finger to brush just the once against Arthur's hand in return.
greatoldjohn: (in: looking over)

[personal profile] greatoldjohn 2022-12-27 12:06 am (UTC)(link)
[Agreed. The various layers and timelines that are connected to the reality that we're familiar with are, to the best of my understanding, entirely disconnected from the kind of people and beings that are found here.
Meaning the Admiral is on a higher level of reality than even Kayne would be a part of.

Something he can't access.

...I still want to check, though. Just in case. I trust the Admiral to be honest with us. Especially because it's not in his interest to do anything else.
]