[It's easy to pretend he can hate himself a little less, when he feels John's love so intensely through him. So he squeezes against him a bit tighter, like if he tries he can keep some of that love for himself.]
I-I should... [He takes a breath, and tries again.] I should- tell people. About... this.
Re: after a few days
I-I should... [He takes a breath, and tries again.] I should- tell people. About... this.